Hello! Have you ever noticed the link at the top of this site called “writing.”?

You haven’t been clicking on it.

I can tell.

But you really should! It’s a collection of a lot of features I’ve had published over the past few years, including the celebrity interviews I do for my dayjob. Anyway, I’ve spent the past few weeks transcribing them so they’re easier to read. They are now available in full on this site or as a Google Docs link of the full layout. I’ve even given you the option to go all old school and download a PDF to your computer. That way you can enjoy these works in some godforsaken place where you don’t have access to the internet. On camping trips. In a submarine on a spy mission. On the moon. In purgatory with all the unbaptized babies. Wherever top-notch feature writing is enjoyed.